ALIN says...

It's Just Not Okay Anymore

2012-01-15T22:17:00.001+08:00

When it comes to the point that it's not okay anymore for me to pretend like I am cool with everything that is going on... Hmm entahlah. Probably will just distance myself, keep quiet, not in the mood to talk to anyone. Will just have to swallow everything, just to make life bearable.

1st Day of 2012

2012-01-02T12:51:00.001+08:00

Just chilled at home most of the time. Bliss.

Was wide awake at 4.45 am. I guess I had a really good sleep that night, I don't even hear the slightest sound of fireworks. And living in Miri for the past 2 years, the sound can be seriously loud. So being all fresh that early is definitely my 'green button' for the day.

Not a photo of mine, but I swear my sweet potato muffin looks exactly like this.

Went to the kitchen to prepare some sweet potato muffins that I've already planned. Well, I wanted to cook more this year, and eat out less, so yeah, one of the healthiest snacks that you can easily make is sweet potato muffins. There's no flour in it, no sugar in it, only all the healthy (and of course pricey) ingredients are in there. Marinated some chicken too for some of my meal this week. I've done this before (eating healthily, I mean), and I know the secret to a successful eating habit is to plan earlier. I have my 7 day meal plan, I have equip my kitchen with only healthy food, I know when I'm going to have my cheat meal - that's basically the deal. So for 2012, I'm going to kick start with Lee Labrada's 7 Days of Lean Body Meals (with of course, a little tweak to it) which I find pretty interesting as it suits my lifestyle - I'm allowed coffee, and the meals are pretty tasty (and importantly doable and easy to cook) if you ask me.

So I went to Taman Bulatan after I put the muffins in the oven. I completed my 10 km routine, it has been a while. I had my right ankle sprained when practicing for Penang Bridge Marathon (although I managed to break my own personal record during the run, yeay!), and that was why I slowed down a little on running. I just wanted to refocus on gym training again, because I know (and many people has been telling me this!) that my body is at its best during my gym era.

And I came home at 9 am to a kitchen which smelled oh so good! You guys seriously have to try out this recipe. The sweet potato muffins tasted so good too.

I'm seriously hoping to get back on track with my healthy eating and weight lifting. Okay enough rambling about this or I might jinx it. We'll just see the results.

The rest of the day - I watched TV, lied down on the bed, cooked lunch and dinner, talked on the phone, pampered myself - exactly just the way I've intended it to be.

To a great start of 2012, insyaAllah.

2011

2011-12-31T12:18:00.000+08:00

... a big year for me. Let's recap.

1. I started living on my own. Like rent a house, live alone, without any housemate. Started buying furniture and electrical appliances, and not forgetting barang-barang rumah that I always tell myself mak-mak yang selalu beli (those pinggan mangkuk, bedsheets, langsir, etc). Yay to total independent this year. Scary? Big time. But I survived.

2. I made more friends. I think I socialize better now. I have more confident to mingle around, and I think I can just blend in with anybody. I'm the kind of person who don't just stick to one group of people, so yeah most of the time you'll see me hangout with different people.

3. That big breakup happened. Of a 2-year relationship with a really great someone. Someone who knows how to show his love. My soulmate. But not everyone are lucky enough to end up with their soulmates. I'm one of the unlucky ones, but it's okay. He is a chapter in my life that I would never regret.

4. And I started to run. Which initially symbolized running from reality and also running towards the unknown future, and along the line, it got me hooked. I would never have thought I can run 10 km straight, but I've proved myself wrong. Made my parents proud, that's the best feeling.

5. I traveled more. Experienced Johor, Melaka and Negeri Sembilan, backpacking style. Long roadtrips to Kota Kinabalu and Kuching with friends. Explored most of Sarawak. I did white water rafting for the first time.

6. And then E&P happened. Got to make new friends - some remain as really close friends. Got a new perspective about oil and gas industry. Got to appreciate my job more when I had to leave the office for three weeks. Started an unexpected friendship with an unexpected someone. So yes, E&P is kinda big thing for me.

7. A tad more stable in term of financial, alhamdulillah. First time getting bonus, and my salary's increased twice within 6 months. I know I'm spending more now, but safe to say I do have a proper saving. Yet, for 2012, I'm hoping to have a better control of my spending. Yikes.

8. My body's at the peak of its health state. It's true when people say you are at your most healthiest when you are at 25. I know I'm fit than before, nothing can stop me. I only fell sick once or twice this year, but that's only because of stomach upset. Feel so bless with the good health.

9. Career wise, I'm proud of what I have achieved right now. I know my job in and out, and I have accomplished my KPIs, although not with flying colors. I know I've done my very best. Hoping to deliver better in 2012.

10. My family's happier. Or at least that's how I feel. Patched things up with my parents after my going against them due to their disagreement of my previous relationship. Learned my lesson, the hard way.

2011 was awesome, so let's make 2012 a much more fantastic ones! :)

Camwhoring Like Nobody's Business

2011-12-25T00:48:00.000+08:00

Was browsing through photos in my harddisk drive and in my phone, and I noticed that I do this quite a lot.

This was like, last week.
Jalan-jalan Bintang Mall for no apparent reason.

This was few weeks back in Sogo KL, while waiting for Huda to try on the Jeep shirt.

A month ago in Midvalley KL.

Few months ago in Levi's, Suria Sabah.

Changing room in Bintang Mall. Again.

Even in hotel's washroom...

Few weeks back in Banana Republic, The Gardens KL.

Even at the gym.

Sungguh unstoppable :D

Stuffs I Carry In My Handbag

2011-12-23T00:31:00.002+08:00

I know some people (especially the boys) are curious about the stuffs I carry in my handbag. I myself am very curious too about what other girls carry in theirs. I have four handbags that I frequently use (hah! don't judge), so whenever I use any of it, I will make sure all the items in the list below are in the bag.

1. Mobile - Don't think I can live without my Blackberry.

2. Wallet - Carries some cash (both Malaysian Ringgit and Brunei Dollar), ID, driving license, and two credit cards. I tidy up my wallet at the end of the day to keep all old receipts and loose change at bay.

3. Keys - Car key, house keys, the usual. Am still on the quest to look for a perfect, lightweight keychain.

4. Sunglasses - My Rayban Aviator. I just can't bear driving under the glaring sunlight.

5. Notebook and Pen - When I need to jot down my random thoughts, or my grocery list. Or just when I hangout with friends and suddenly we need pen and paper.

6. Foldable Umbrella - Something handy to carry around especially during this rainy season.

7. Starbucks Card Holder - Which I used to carry my staff ID.

8. Makeup - Most of the time I carry very minimal makeup; my compact powder with a mirror (important!), lipstick, lipgloss and lipbalm, together with a pack of tissue and a comb. Would carry a makeup case if I don't have time to do my makeup at home.

9. Gums or Mints - No preference so far, but I'm having this latest addiction of chewing gums after meals. Nice to have, I don't mind if I go without any.

10. Medication - I make sure to carry some Panadol (especially the pink ones), Handiplast and hand sanitizer.

Those are the basic items that are always in my handbag. I am a neat freak, so I do make sure to reevaluate the stuffs in my handbag everyday, just so that I don't carry around unnecessary weight. Will throw in some additional items like pashmina, books and water bottle when I'm travelling, and that's it.

So tell me, what do you carry in your handbags?

Products I Swear By

2011-12-18T08:33:00.000+08:00

Warning : Strictly girly stuffs.

1. Bobbi Brown Stick Foundation

I've been loyal to this product for the past 6 years. I've tried pretty much all the other foundation, but none can compete with this. One stick can last years, believe me. It has good coverage, can be used daily (just reduce the amount than if you were to used it to events). This was recommended to me by my best friend (well, who else?).

Not just foundation, but I pretty much prefer all Bobbi Brown base makeups - makeup primer, compact powder, loose powder, corrector and concealer. Worth every penny. Just walk to any Bobbi Brown counter and they will find the perfect shade for you.

2. Victoria Secret's Refreshing Body Mist

Loving this Secret Garden range. I like this product just because it smells oh so nice! Keep my body fresh after shower. I shower before I go to sleep too, so yes, this makes me smell all nice when I'm in bed. Princess-y feeling, get it? Get it?

This is the product that I never fail to buy everytime I'm at KLIA, because there's always promotion like buy 2, free 1, something like that. And it's really cheap there too, only RM42 per bottle. All smells nice, so when buying I will always try out different ones. Currently on Vanilla Lace, very sexy vanilla smell. The smell makes guys go crazy, true story ;)

3. The Body Shop Detangling Comb

I'm not The Body Shop girl - I prefer L'occitane, Crabtree & Evelyn or Mark and Spencer for my body wash or lotion - but I'm so in love with this detangling comb. Sleek and small that I can carry in my makeup case, and at the same time it works just as the name suggests - it detangles. Take it from someone who has big, curly hair, this comb is sure a savior. I find that my hair falls lesser than if I were to use a plastic comb (hydrostatic, remember?). I carry this everywhere.

4. Estee Lauder Hydrationist Range

Been loyal to Estee Lauder skincare products since I was a student, because it works. It hydrates well. My skin is really prone to dryness (my hands and feet are really dry! urgh, yet to find a good product), but this products really help to put the worries away, at least for my face. I use all Estee Lauder skincare - cleanser, serum, toner, moisturizer, sunblock, scrub, mask, makeup remover, eye cream, night cream (Advance Night Repair is strictly recommended!). I'm loyal to Estee Lauder's makeup too, because the color is really natural and it's really mild to the skin. And of course, I complete my look with a spritz of Estee Lauder Sensuous Nude Perfume.

So yeah, if you happen to walk pass my vanity desk, you'll see that Estee Lauder products rule.

5. Asience Shampoo

For a really good product, you can only find this at Watson's or Jusco, I wonder why. This was recommended to me by a friend's sister. I was mesmerized by how healthy her hair is, and she willingly shared her beauty secret. I gave it a try, and for someone who had tried out all brand of shampoos (over the counter or those high end products, you name it) but to no avail, this is the one which works. There's nothing more satisfying that experiencing first hand the claims of a hair products. My hair has seen so much improvement - it feels much more healthier now. Been recommending this to friends and family, and so far I'm getting all positive feedback! :)

My Vulnerable Self

2011-12-04T19:36:00.001+08:00

I'm a strong, independent girl - I don't need a man to support me financially, I don't have any psychological or insecurities issues that a man can fix, I don't need rescuing from myself. So yes, I do think that I am pretty much self sufficient.

So to let myself become vulnerable - finally exposing my feeling, letting my guard down - it was totally scary, but at the same time it was totally worth it.

At least for the fact that I don't keep on questioning, or worst, keep on hoping.

I managed my fear. And I'm so proud of that.

My strength comes from my vulnerability. I shed my defensive layer, I basically turned off the defense mechanism I've built, I let everything out. And that's okay. Because that reminds me that I am only human, I'm real - I feel, I cry, I love, I need.

Yes, I've exposed my vulnerable self. Time's up. Now back to the other selves that have been functioning to protect my vulnerable self.

Am Loving This Song

2011-11-25T23:18:00.000+08:00

Just the kind of song I like - Lagu by Bedroom Sanctuary. Enjoy!

Hari ku harus dipenuhi dengan kehadiranmu, sayangku
Fikiranku hanya dipenuhi dengan senyumanmu
Alangkah indah jika dirimu sentiasa disisiku, sayangku
Berikanku hanya satu, hanya satu lagu

Hari ku harus dipenuhi dengan kemanjaanmu, cintaku
Fikiranku hanya dipenuhi dengan suaramu, divaku
Alangkah indah jika dirimu sentiasa disisiku, sayangku
Berikanku hanya satu, hanya satu lagu

Of Internet Connection

2011-11-24T19:18:00.001+08:00

Finally, there's Streamyx at my house, wee!

It's not that I don't want to install Streamyx earlier, but the phone line is only recently available at my housing area. It sucks big time not to have a broadband, but I managed to survive for about 2 years without any.

Anywho, now that I have broadband connection, you can expect a tad more updates in this blog. Sorry guys for the silent treatment. Will make up for it, insyaAllah. I have a long list of things to update, I swear ;)

Got to go for now. Keep on reading.

After 23 Days...

2011-10-31T11:31:00.002+08:00

... I'm few pounds heavier.
... I'm definitely happier.
... I'm a little bit more knowledgeable about oil and gas industry.
... I'm a tad wiser.
... I'm having more friends.
... and I'm 100% ready to go back to work!

Will definitely miss all of them.

Especially my group mates, so called Over Achievers ;)

Let the ukhuwah remains, insyaAllah.

Can't Wait To Watch...

2011-10-28T00:32:00.000+08:00

I just can't wait to watch Sherlock Holmes : A Game Of Shadows! Check out the posters. Aren't they tempting enough?

Robert Downey Jr is my favorite actor after he starred as Iron Man (don't think there's any other actors who can play that role), so obviously I would not miss any of his movies. He acts wonderfully (besides looking so good *cough*). He can be funny at times too. Go and watch Due Date if you haven't. It's a good movie, too.

And oh, come on, who would not look forward to watching Jude Law?

Another two movies by Robert Downey Jr that I'm looking forward to are The Avengers (2012) and Iron Man 3 (2013). OMG, seriously can't wait! 2 more years to go. Urgh.

Lesson Learned

2011-10-19T17:28:00.001+08:00

If I ever feel unfortunate in life that I'm not as attractive as some of the girls, I should be grateful that my life isn't haunted by psycho guys who were willing to do anything, and I mean anything, just to have me.

If I ever feel sad that I'm still single at the age of 25 when most of my friends are either getting married, getting engaged, or getting pregnant, I should feel blessed that I still have the opportunities to broaden up my horizon and get to know lots of people in life.

You just don't know the struggle other people has to go through. They might be 'lucky' in certain areas (pretty, settle down very young, etc), but they might be 'unlucky' in other areas as well. Just like you, you have your own 'lucky' and 'unlucky' points too.

So girls. Never ever compare yourselves to others. Because nothing good will come out of it. All it does is just killing your own self esteems. Believe me, I did that to myself for years only to look back and regret all the opportunities that I've missed for second guessing myself, for thinking that I won't be good enough.

Sent via BlackBerry from Maxis

Out of Office for 3 Weeks! Awesome, Is It Not? ;)

2011-10-07T01:01:00.001+08:00

Been flying back and forth this past one month. Rezeki, as I would say. Before raya, I had been telling friends and family than I won't see them much this year. But thankfully the opportunities to travel came every week. Of course, there's work and responsibilities to be delivered.

And I'm going back to KL again this evening for a 3-week course. I don't really know what to expect though. Will just go with an open mind and to learn as much as I can, insyaAllah. Yet, I don't want to leave the office with pending works, so I have to try to clear things off as much possible. Don't want to be a burden to colleagues whom I'm going to handover to.

Another long day before (hopefully) a nice weekend!

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10 km Run

2011-09-25T12:57:00.001+08:00

I started running (well, I can't say marathon as I'm just taking part in 10 km run) after my breakup early this year. It started with just a fun getaway to Kota Kinabalu to ease my mind and at the same time joining Borneo International Marathon (BIM) 2011.

My bestfriend was the one who asked me to join her in BIM.

BIM was the first event I joined. I didn't even train properly - I ran 5 km each day on treadmill for about 2 weeks and I did my gym routine. So during the race, it was my first experience completing a 10 km run outdoor, and my record is 1 hour 19 minutes. I didn't stop running at all along the route. I was really proud of my personal record as I was a first timer.

That got me hooked. I started to register for more runs - Standard Chartered KL Marathon (KLM), Adidas King of the Road (KOTR) and Penang Bridge International Marathon (PBIM). I concentrated more on my running compared to my gym workout. Well, suffice to say I ditched my workout completely (although I have plan to the hit the gym again). Once you know that can run 10 km, you have the confidence that you can do it again, and really it's addictive.

Friends and cousin showing off our finisher medals at KLM.

When I joined KLM, I took the race more seriously. I think I ran better during KLM although I completed it in 1 hour 22 minutes. The track was different - BIM was relatively easy I would say, as it only involved flat surfaces, but KLM was more of a challenge due to the inclination. But I love it, I know I have more strength during the race, and I was not tired after the run (believe me I can still go shopping after that).

My family waited at the finishing line of TIM, how sweet :)

And today I completed 10 km run at Taiping International Marathon (TIM). I didn't plan to join today's race as I thought it's not really worth it to fly back here (last minute tickets for Miri - KL are really pricey!). It was just my luck when I was asked to go to KL for a meeting this coming Monday, and luckily there's still room for registration. This race also tested your strength and determination at running on incline track. I haven't fully recover from fever yet, so I was feeling a little bit out of breath. But it may also be a cause of not training consistently after raya. I still managed to complete the race in 1 hour 21 minutes though.

Next week is the KOTR, and it's the first time I have back to back races in just one week gap. Hopefully I have ample time to recover. This time too, my family will be there to support, insyaAllah.

5 races this year, alhamdulillah. I'm targeting 8 races next year, or perhaps I should try half marathon (21 km)?

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RayBan Aviator

2011-09-16T14:42:00.002+08:00

At 7 month old, and my father already let me wear his sunglasses. The taste of fashion has already been developed since I was young.

Just got myself the most wanted RayBan Aviator last week. I fancy a Wayfarer too, but my headscarf would not look nice when I'm wearing it.

I searched high and low for old photos of mine, and look at what I found! ;)

When They Only Hear One Side Of The Story, And It's Not Your Side Of The Story...

2011-09-12T16:09:00.003+08:00

Just be quiet, and smile. For one day they will know and understand your reasons.

Not many will listen to stories from both sides anyways. That's life.

If say, for example, you dumped your boyfriend because he's such a jerk, and you know he had been telling people his side of the story, just remain calm. Don't ever go telling others why you had to dump him (of course you need to tell your best friends or someone close to you, but that's it). Yes, you'll lose some friends for they will be on his side (because that's the side of the story that they hear, remember?) and they will think badly about you, but it's okay. Just have a little patience, and pray hard.

Because eventually, all those friends (who will be hanging out a lot with your ex) will get to see his true color. And they will understand why you had to dump him in the first place. They will have more sympathy towards you after that (and of course they'll feel guilty for not listening to your side of the story), and even better, you'll get your friends back.

That's what I learned from my experiences. Never bad mouth others even if they had ill-treated you. You know you are not doing anything wrong, and that's enough. You don't need to go telling people just to get their attention and to let them back you up. Even worst if you tell those people not to be friend with your 'enemy'.

Be it problems with your friends, ex-lovers, house mates, colleagues, bosses, family members - keep the side of your story. You don't need to justify yourselves, not to anyone. The truth will reveal itself without you even trying.

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Of Branded Handbags

2011-09-10T08:08:00.001+08:00

I was born to love branded goods. Somehow it has been embedded in my mind that branded, expensive goods equals quality stuffs. Most of the time, it's true though. How many times do you have to replace your RM10 wallets for example than if you were to use a RM599 wallet? Exactly.

My best friend was telling me about this Anya Hindmarch Core Collection handbag that she desires. She really has a good taste when it comes to fashion. If I were to trust one person to shop for me, she's definitely the one.

So she was telling that every woman deserves a good, branded, leather handbag. One handbag that you really want and will not mind to spend a fortune on it. I couldn't agree more. But what got me into thinking is I don't have that choice yet. The one handbag that I really want, I mean.

That got me into a quest for a handbag. And I found it. This one handbag, or hobo bag as they called it, that makes my heart skipped a beat when I first saw.

It's a Marc Jacob Classic Q Hillier Hobo bag. It's perfectly the way I like a handbag to be - big but not oversize, full leather, pleated details, with both straps and handles, variety of colors. And when I looked at the price, obviously I can own it with a swipe of a plastic card, but I had to tell myself no. At least not now. That special bag deserves to be mine on a special occasion too. My next birthday perhaps? ;)

That's provided I didn't find another amazing handbag!

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Obat Hati

2011-09-09T23:12:00.003+08:00

Kekadang kita tak tahu dan tak pernah mengerti kenapa hidup ini terasa begitu sulit untuk dijalani. Kekadang terasa menghimpit, sedikit demi sedikit, bertambah menjalani sulit.

Padahal semua kebutuhan hidup terasa tidak pernah kurang, semakin bertambah, hidup sepertinya senang, harta melimpah, rezeki didapat dengan mudah. Tapi kenapa hidup ini terasa semakin sulit untuk dijalani?

Ternyata bukan hidup yang semakin sulit, tapi hati yang terlalu sempit, selalu berpenyakit.

Obat hati ada 5 perkaranya;
Yang pertama : Baca Quran dan maknanya.
Yang kedua : Solat malam dirikanlah.
Yang ketiga : Berkumpullah dengan orang soleh.
Yang keempat : Perbanyaklah berpuasa.
Yang kelima : Zikir malam lagukanlah.

Salah satunya, siapa bisa menjalani, moga-moga gusti Allah mencukupi.

- extracted from Obat Hati - Ebith Beat*A

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Something To Take My Mind Off All The Problems

2011-09-07T00:26:00.002+08:00

Two of the things I love to do most are : 1. shopping, and 2. decorating the house.

Although I'm renting, I still want to make the house as homey as possible. I want to come back to a home, and I would not mind spending money for the furnitures and appliances. But being cost conscious *cough*, of course I will seek high and low for the best deal.

So I've decided to give my house a makeover as my new project. Which means there's going to be LOTS of shopping and LOTS of decorating! Well, actually I've started with buying pillows, white bedsheet and items like nails, hammer, those sort of necessities.

There's many great ideas in my head and it's just a matter of fact whether I'll be able to materialize it or not. Of course the only constraint is I can't paint the walls (yikes!), so I have to make do of white walls.

Wish me luck you guys! Hopefully I'll have some great things to show in here later on. This is going to be my biggest project so far ever since I'm in Miri. I'm so excited I can't wait to start decorating already!

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Of Breakups

2011-09-05T04:31:00.003+08:00

I've had breakups, twice to be exact. The first one was of a 5 year old relationship, and the second one was of a 2 year old (almost) relationship.

Moving on is a very hard thing to do. But to deal and cope when you know that your ex is already dating someone new is even harder. It's like dealing with the breakup all over again.

But what was I expecting? Did I expect him to come back and reconcile our relationship? No, I don't think so. But why do I feel sad and betrayed when I know this news?

I keep questioning myself. Why did I trust him? Why did I love him? Is she better than me? What did I do wrong? Did he love her when we were still together?

Man, this is killing me.

I think this is why people say you can't be friend with your ex. Guess I can't break the tradition.

In need to make myself busy and start the process of healing all over again. Hoping that I'll stay strong. Ya Allah, please help.

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Why Am I Still Up At This Hour?

2011-09-05T02:25:00.001+08:00

Is merely because I have a Mid Year Performance Review to complete. Looking at it, my progress is really slow, even I know that the dateline is tomorrow.

Coffee can't even make me work any faster though. I mean, come on, most of us are still on Raya mood, what were the HR thinking when they set the dateline? I am seriously hoping that they'll announce the dateline revision by tomorrow, or I am officially a dead meat.

Anyhow, I'll be travelling to Miri tomorrow (in case you still don't know, I've reside in Miri, Sarawak for about 2 years already, earning a living). It's going to be a long day. I've to travel to KL, and luckily this time my mum was able to persuade my dad to send me off to KLIA, but of course I have to drive from Taiping to KL (and in case you don't know, I'm originally from Taiping, Perak). Lucky those of you whose hometowns are in KL!

Need to reset the work button again, and hoping for a great start this week, insyaAllah.

Work hard you guys who have started working!

Another New Beginning

2011-09-04T00:55:00.001+08:00

Been writing and deleting my blog entries. Looking for a direction.

Still, I don't think I've found it. The direction, I mean. But nevertheless, my love towards writing is still there. Of course with development of microblogging (read : Twitter) and social networking (read : Facebook), blogging is no longer that popular just like how it used to be during those good old days.

I've decided to keep this blog alive again just for the sake of record keeping. Time flies very fast these days, and there's many memorable events that need to be recorded somehow. Conventional diary isn't an option, so obviously I've no other choice but to blog.

Majority of my readers are old friends, but for those who just stumble upon this humble blog, welcome. I don't bite, so feel free to comment. I'm hoping that I can be consistent in writing new entries. I will be writing in whichever language that I feel comfortable with at the point of time I'm writing. Hopefully you guys won't mind.

Keep reading!